Wednesday, June 08, 2005

On disappointing a male reader

The world of men sometimes saddens me.

(While I still resent the fact that they have most of the fun, what with being able to get away with not being pregnant, all the beneficial non-consequences of not having kids, not getting raped (at least, not by women), not being burnt for dowry, not needing toilets everywhere they go, being President of the USA and bombing smaller countries....
but sometimes, the world of men saddens me.)

Especially on days when I get up and read about classifieds like 'My name is Radkar' or, about men who proposition a relationship - inter-city too! - but want to do it 'formally'.

It is sad, isn't it, thinking of all those guys, sending in a name to dating-classifieds, checking out the blogosphere in the forlorn hope of finding 'formal relationships'...
and it totally breaks my heart to think of the poor man who must have spent hours, googling "Lucknow+girl+wearing+panty"

And guess how this great big worldwide web answers this desperate query? By throwing up my humble blog!

Picture this sex-starved creature in Lucknow, waiting (probably at a cyber-cafe, so probably dishing out his pocket-money) to look for nice stimulating images of his fellow-citizenanis.

Perhaps he was sick of the black tents walking about in the narrow alleys off Chowk.
Perhaps he was a schoolboy who couldn't imagine what sort of panties girls in Lucknow wore, if any?!
Perhaps men believe that Lucknowi girls wear special underwear, something that is somehow more... polite?

Picture his disappointment, when he's directed to boring old me droning on about mobile-rail bazaars, and second-hand tales about UP's campus mafia... Bazaars!? Campus politics!? What's this? Arghgh! (Hey bhagwaan... maine kya maanga tha; tune kya diya?)

Poor guy! No panty-shod genteel rumps here, I'm afraid...

Anyway, for me, it is always been fascinating to find out what men are really looking for.
What makes it even more fascinating is that, often, I find - they're telling the truth! They actually have women and/or sex on their minds, most of the time.

I suppose I had better set myself a reminder - next time I am in Lucknow, I must go check out the panty scene there. I promise to blog it.


Ashish Gorde said...

I wish I could write a stirring comment in defense of my gender and tell you, in no uncertain terms, that your post is nothing but a wild exagerration. Sadly, I cannot do so because, in a sense, you are right. We men have let ourselves down by allowing our insecurities to become our defining characteristics. Last week, I had a peek into what most women go through on a regular basis. One sex starved man assumed I was a 'woman' and launched a blitzkrieg on my Yahoo Messenger with please/ requests/ demands to be his friend, and hopefully, lover. The more I rebuffed him the more excited he became till, finally, I had to ask him, 'where is your self-respect?' Eventually, I was able to block him but the experience was a real eye-opener because I was able to see a member of my gender from the 'other' side. And it wasn't a happy sight.

Ashish Gorde said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Amrit said...

Reminds me of those A/S/L days of those shady chatrooms in the late nineties. I guess the world hasn't changed much.

Blogs has this strange tendency to show up in the search engines for all weird combinations of keywords.


kalpataru45 said...

I read somewhere that an average male thinks about sex every 5 minutes. Piqued by this theory, I once tried to record , how many times, I thought about sex in a day. The result: 37 times in 18 hours. That makes it around once in 30 minutes. I think I have a problem.Dammit!!

Annie Zaidi said...

ashish, this was no criticism directed at men. this was just some amusement, and lot of amusement.
amrit - yeah, blogs show up in the strangest of searches... but thats what makes trackbacks so much fun, eh?
marcus - i salute you. an impossible exercise to impose upon oneself

1conoclast said...

Pardon this ignoramus, but what's a trackback?

Janaki said...

yep me too! whats a trackback?

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